30th March 2022
A Whole New World
To the latter, don't do it man. Don't be that sad guy that clings to his ex like a dryer sheet.
A Whole New World
Or, you know, OP could use this opportunity to learn independence and realize that he/she does not need a romantic/sexual partner in their life to be happy.
The advice given in this thread is outright scary tbh. Shows that maturity rarely goes hand-in-hand with academic prowesses, I suppose.
You're a young single guy. You're gonna be a doctor. The world is your oyster (despite what people say here on SDN). You're gonna be in the top 10% in the country in terms of income, and probably in terms of education. Why the heck would you want to be tied down to some girl who doesn't want you? You got a gift here, my friend.
Agree with the second poster. Mark my words, you will regret being friends with her. Why the heck do you want to be friends with someone who ripped your heart off. Don't listen to your female friends, and don't ever discuss her with anyone. Ever. Best friends my a$$. If you want a best friend, get a dog (at least they are loyal).
Definitely hit the gym and hit the dating scene. Once you hook up with a girl hotter than her, you'll completely forget about her. Funny thing about women is that if she sees with you a better looking girl, she'll instantly get jealous and probably try to pursue you again.
Key is to act cool and like you don't give a f***. Don't ever let her see you upset, and if she asks you about anything, act happy and like this was the best thing that ever happened to you (and it is, you just don't realize it). You don't need to say anything to her about not being friends, just treat her like she's an butt ugly chick and you feel sorry for her.
There are thousands of hotter girls who are way more fun and interesting than your ex. Your emotional attachment is blinding you.
I'm older and married now, but have been friendzoned a few times in the past, so a bit of perspective.
Not a lousy person, mind you, or even a lousy friend to others. Just a crappy friend to me. This is the true reason for cutting the cord entirely - it's not enough to accept that no relationship/sex will ever happen; you need to accept that she was an awful friend to you and that you were the one putting in all the work. Cutting all ties is really more about you coming to terms with reality as things are, not as you idealized them to be.
No, you did not have long deep conversations where you could talk about anything. SHE had long conversations where SHE could talk about anything while you had to act interested.
The good news is that things will get WAY better. Speaking as someone with at least a decade on you, let me explain it this way. Right now, most attractive girls your age, if forced to choose between a bitious, financially secure, kindhearted man or a decent-to-above-average looking, unemployed, directionless, broke, but plays in a band sort of guy, well, you know what she's going to pick. Girls your age actually - believe it or not - will say things like "yeah, but he was just too nice."